When my father died, my synagogue gave me a brochure to read called “Taking the Time You Need to Mourn Your Loss,” by Rabbi Anne Brenner. In it, Rabbi Brenner writes (quoting from her own book Mourning & Mitzvah): “Death does not end one’s relationship. Even after a death of one of the members, a relationship can still grow and change and issues can still be explored.”
Despite years of trying to improve our relationship, my father and I still had many unresolved issues between us when he passed away. The idea of continuing to have a conversation with him about these issues, even after his death, and however one-sided, struck a chord with me, and I began to write letters to him. In my next few posts, I’ll be sharing some of these letters.